Late Tuesday afternoon, I was lounging in my kitchen on my sideways couch.  I had already been outside for a run around, and was contemplating how I was going to spend my Tuesday evening.  Such thinking makes me sleepy, so I was sluggishly drifting off to sleep.

Without warning the back door opened.  The humans are often coming and going, so that sound didn’t startle me and I decided that I wasn’t going to look up.  I listened as I heard a human come into my kitchen and close the door behind them.  I counted the seconds, awaiting the inevitable scratch behind my ears.  (NO ONE walks by the sideways couch without petting me.  It’s like a rule.)  But no human touch came.  A few more seconds passed, and I decided to lift my head up and look around.

I didn’t like who I saw.  Or rather, what I saw.

The vacuum clearer is the most irritating appliance that I’ve ever come across.  It’s sneaky and has a total disregard for anyone and everyone around it.  The vacuum can sneak into your personal space almost without a sound, sitting quietly until it suddenly erupts with noise and rolls around the house screeching at the top of it’s lungs. The humans seem to tolerate this noise, but clearly they don’t trust the vacuum, since one of them always follows the vac around the house closely when it’s being loud.  Unfortunately the humans don’t do anything to stop the vacuum from making it’s rounds.

I, on the other hand, handle things differently.

We had tangled before, the vacuum cleaner and I, always to a standstill.  This time would be different, I thought.  This time I’ll show the vacuum who’s boss.

While I lay there daydreaming, the vacuum cleaner sprung to life.  It unleashed it’s screech, snapping me out of la la land and into action. I pressed record on my camera and attacked.

It was over quick.  The vacuum couldn’t take my continuous attack, and finally gave up.  It quieted down and retreated, giving me a very satisfying victory.  I climbed back up into my loft to get some much needed rest.

It’s been a few days, but I haven’t seen or heard from the vacuum cleaner.  I hope he’s gone for good this time, but I doubt it.  And when he does come back I’ll be ready for him.