Remembering the Distinguished Mr. Jazz – Gone But Never Forgotten…
This picture was taken of Jazz in April of 2013 – this was right about when we started to notice his health was beginning to decline. To see full beauty of his image, please click to enlarge.
A year passes far too quickly. How is it that my Mr. Jazz has already been gone for 365 days when it seems like just yesterday he was snuggling on the couch with me, making biscuits on my chest with his big bear paws. But it’s true. Today marks the anniversary of the date I had to say goodbye to one of my best friends.
While my heart is still heavy with sadness, I have decided not to take the maudlin road that remains inside me, but rather to celebrate the day. Celebrate the fact that I was blessed to have him as part of my life and celebrate the fact that the love, joy, and friendship he gave me for 15 years far outweighs any of the sadness and grief I might still be feeling at his passing.
A tisket a tasket, the first picture of my beloved Jazz in a basket. Seen here Jazz was about 12 weeks old.
Jazz came to me practically a lifetime ago as a Mother’s Day present from my two boys. I had fallen hopelessly in love with the Ragdoll breed after seeing them for the first time on an Animal Planet show about cat breeds and I was adamant that was the gift I wanted. We already had a house full of other cats and dogs, but my heart was longing for what I thought was the most beautiful cat I had ever seen and so we subsequently found a cattery where I was able to pick out any kitten I wanted. Naturally, me being me, I instantly gravitated to the runt of the litter who also happened to be sick with an eye infection and a chronic cough. None of that mattered – my heart melted at the sight of what I knew would be my kitten and I vowed right then and there to be his forevermore guardian who would nurse him back to health with my love.
When we brought Jazz home, he had to be in quarantine for a couple of weeks so that his infection would not affect the other cats and we became best buddies as I took care of him around the clock, giving him special medicines and kitten food. At that point, he was just a tiny thing, primarily white in color, as it can take Ragdolls several years to develop their full color range, and despite being sick, he was a sweet and good-natured boy. His happy-go-lucky temperament became his trademark, causing me to bestow him with the name Jazz (aka Jazzy and years later as he matured, Mr. Jazz) because it suited his carefree ways.
This photo of Jazz was from 2011 and was taken during one of our outdoor excursions. He was so vibrant and healthy back then…
Throughout the years Jazz remained a sweetheart and was never any trouble. Sure, maybe and occasional hiss here and there, but at heart he was a lover and a snuggler and his happiest moments were napping with, on, or next to me. It was not until the last months of his life that he showed any aggression towards me at all, but I knew it was not directed at me per se, but merely his response and exhaustion to the medications he was taking and the fact that I had to force feed him at this point.
No matter where I was, Jazz was always by my side. This photo was from 2012 when he was helping me review the Sleepypod carrier!
When his life began to be measured in hours and minutes rather than days, months, and years, I knew despite how much it broke my heart to the very core, that the greatest gift I could ever give him was to allow him his dignity and let him go. Thankfully I did not have to make that decision alone, as he was very much loved by Dan as well and we both knew we had to help Jazz cross to the Bridge to avoid any suffering he might have been going through.
So, in tribute to his memory and the 15 wonderful years of life he lived, I thought the perfect way to honor his passing would be to share a sneak peek excerpt from the draft prologue of his book so that you could understand why I said from the beginning of this post that this anniversary day is meant to be a celebration because that is how he wanted it:
My name is Mr. Jazz. I am a Ragdoll cat and on August 28th, 2013, after 15 years of life, I asked my beloved humans for the most difficult gift of all – to help cross me to the Rainbow Bridge. I had never asked them for much of anything else before – I was always a humble cat with simple desires – quiet naps on the couch, the love of my family, and a full belly were all I really cared about and those needs were always fulfilled for me. I never aspired towards fame and writing my story was not part of my master plan.
But, the truth was, my death had deeply touched the hearts of a wide audience and I couldn’t ignore the fact that there appeared to be a greater purpose to it all – my death brought with it lessons learned that needed to be told from my point of view so that anyone who had ever loved and had to say goodbye to a cherished pet, could understand from a pet’s perspective that when it is our time to go, we want you to let us, no matter how difficult that might be for you. We want you to understand that when that moment happens and we are gone from your life in the physical sense, that we remain in your hearts and souls forevermore and that the intense pain you feel as you grieve for us will eventually soften, to be replaced with the memories of happier days shared with us.
Naturally I realize parts of this story will undoubtedly sadden some of you, after all, it is about my death, but that is actually not my intention at all and I hope it won’t stop you from reading on. For what this story really is, is a celebration. A celebration of my life and the life of all animals who find a way into the hearts and homes of our human guardians across the world, whatever our unique circumstances might be. We are grateful for the love, companionship, and care you give us, for however long or brief that moment on this earth may be, and my story is about honoring that relationship and being able to find the joy, beauty, and dignity of letting us go when it is our time…
Despite the unflattering nature, I love this photo and all it represents. It was taken about a month ago while I was on the couch in my office tightening up the draft on Jazz’s book. Kizmet is at my feet and you can see Peanut’s tail in the top right corner which is where Jazz used to love to nap.
RIP my darling boy…I am trying ever so hard to be strong, but I truly do miss you each and every day and you will forgive me if I go and give myself a good cry…
What a beautiful tribute to a very handsome kitty. It’s nice you have such great photos to help you remember. We can never have enough of those. M sends hugs to your human.
Thank you for the hugs from you and your human, mariodacat. Very much appreciated and I am so glad to have the photos as well!
I can’t believe it’s been a year. Thinking of you on this first anniversary and sending you love and light.
Thank you Ingrid.
Beautiful tribute. Mr Jazz will never be forgotten. Big hugs.
Hugs back to you Sue – I know you have suffered a loss as well and my heart goes out to you.
Lovely tribute to such an oh so lovely Mr. Jazz. Oh Deb it’s so hard to believe it’s been a year. Please know that you and Dan are in my heart♥
Thank you Toni – very much appreciated.
He was truly a beautiful and special cat. Your love and devotion to him are inspiring.
That is very kind of you to say Rosemary – thank you.
♥♥♥
pleez ta noe dood jazz iz knot gone…him just haza diffrunt address; matter oh fact
him iz round de korner frum uz…and across de street frum kit…who by de way iz
throwin a partee two day in jazz’s honor…kinda like an irish wake; but we will knot
bee eatin cabbage; less itz been mare a nated with grazz N fish oil…N we will raize
ten kinds oh hell….oopz….ment ta say we will raize R glasses… 😉 uh huh….
furst witha toast, then we will eat sum toast plus we will be tellin storeez bout how kewl
R peepulz iz & who ever tellz de best storee which two day will be jazz, gets a yeerz supply
of pie….sa wheet huh !!
♥♥♥
dude & sauce =^..^=
Sounds like a great celebration da tabbies and I do hope that Jazz, Kit, Sauce, and all of our beloved furfriends up there are having a great time together!
How quickly time passes! So hard to believe it’s been a whole year.
What a beautiful tribute to your special Mr. Jazz.
Sending your sweet thoughts and comforting purrs…
xo
Thank you Glogirly and Katie – I appreciate it.
I also cannot believe it has been a year. Sending you much love and (((hugs))) to offer comfort on this difficult day
Thank you Caren – I appreciate the love and hugs!
Has it really been a year? So much has happened this past year for so many in our blogging community, but the time seems compressed somehow.
Thinking of you and sending hugs to you and the family today. Milestone anniversary dates are tough ones.
It has been a very tough year in so many ways for many of us in the cat blogosphere this year Sometimes Cats Herd You – you are so very right and my heart goes out to all who have suffered a loss. Thank you for your hugs.
Beautiful tribute to your beloved Mr.Jazz. We send you comforting purrs. Purrs
Thank you so much Swiss Cats.
That really was a most wonderful tribute. We too cannot believe it has been one year.
Thank you Brian.
Such a beautiful tribute to handsome Mr Jazz. (((hugs)))
Thank you Flynn.
It feels like yesterday that Jazz went to the bridge. Beautiful tribute to the one and only Jazz. Sending love and purrs of remembrance.
Thank you for the hugs and purrs Layla.
Thank you, Deb, for a good cry. As much for My own darlings as the darlings you have shared with us. Your Mr. Jazz–looking forward to your book. Mr. Jazz has taken a spot in my Cat Garden. Your love certainly gives light to the Summerland. Hugs. I know this won’t always be an easy task.
Thank you ever so much for your kind words Deborah – they mean the world to me and it has been a pleasure getting to know you. I appreciate you looking forward to the book as well.
Purrs to you as you remember your special boy today.
Thank you for the purrs Island Cats.
Dearest Deb,
It is hard to believe it’s been a year, but indeed time does pass quickly. As always, it was a beautiful post, especially for your dear boy Mr. Jazz. Healing comes when it comes. It can never be rushed; yet one day you will realize that you feel more joy at the memories, than pain at the loss.
Sending you special Pixel hugs & kisses & a big hug from Jenny.
Love, Pixel & Jenny
Thank you so much for the love, hugs, and kisses Pixel and Jenny. I will never forget our time together at BlogPaws and your support means the world to me.
it always feels like that but you are right we should celebrate them when they are gone,enjoy those memories Deb and yes a few tears is ok too,with love Rachel and Speedy
Thank you Speedyrabbit – I know you understand my range of emotions and I appreciate you stopping by to comment.
Deb, that’s beautiful, my heart is with you.
Thank you so much Connie Marie.
Our heart losses were only 17 days apart. So I feel the gamut of emotions you lived with and still live with each day. At day 382 I find a gradual softening releasing the terrible grip Grief has had over my heart. I can see in your writings that you do as. It will continue to be a Journey throughout our lives that we live with and incorporate within the loss to heart we have suffered. Abby was my heart and soul, so her loss was utter devastation for me. As much as I love Gracie and miss her desperately, her loss 6 months after Abby left me sadden, but it was made so much clearer by what I had undergone with Abby. I learned so many lessons about life, love and loss with her and I’m still learning and trying to find peace with it all. One day. I wish you the same. I will get your book when it comes out. Thank you for your comment on Abby’s anniversary.
Angel AbbyGrace – Our paths are so similar and I know what you mean about the lessons about life, love, and loss. Jazz truly opened my eyes to appreciating each and every moment we are blessed to share with our pets. It is not always an easy lesson to follow – losing Harley unexpectedly a few months ago was utterly devastating to me but I am trying to find my center and balance through the wisdom of Jazz. His book is all about that message and I do think you will appreciate his story. You and I will always share a common bond each and every August and my heart goes out to you as well.
It doesn’t feel like it’s been a full year since Mr. Jazz left us…and every single time I see a photo of him, I’m struck by his beauty. His coat was so special!
You know, Deb, for some reason when I read your posts I think of my dear mom, who is still alive but not entirely with it. I think of her at my age, and I so wish that she lived in a time when she could have found a community of loving, caring cat bloggers and authors where writing would have been an option for her. So many stories she could have composed and likely would have touched the lives and hearts of others. I’m so happy that I’ve found you and that you–by being you–are bringing forth a very familiar essence for me. I have so much gratitude for that, and it inspires me to be another vehicle for this energy. Thanks for sharing an excerpt with us, and I look forward to your publication. You know I’m still a devoted fan of the fantastic Mr. Jazz.
Peace.
Wow, Laura Zaccardi, what a beautiful thing to say. I wish your Mom had had the wonderful web of pet bloggers we now envelope as part of our daily lives, as part of our “family” each day, earlier in her life. Perhaps you could still share some of these wonderful posts with her. Deb truly is special with a heart of compassion & a soul filled with love. I knew that from the very first day we met. She was mine & Pixel’s saving grace that day.
I wish you & your Mom well Laura and I hope you get to share some happy moments together, talking of cats & just enjoying each other’s company.
Jenny & Pixel
Pixel Blue Eyes – you and your human are so kind and believe it or not, you were my saving grace as well. I had found out Jazz had taken a turn for the worse at BlogPaws and being around Pixel really helped my mental well-being. I will always be grateful for your friendship and how nice of you also to leave a comment for Laura. Laura is one of my “old-soul” friends and I hope one day to meet her in person!
Thank you Jenny and Pixel. The only thing my mom and I can talk about for extended periods is cats. Instead of trying to explain Blogs or Facebook or Twitter, I simply say “a friend’s cat,” and she loves the stories. It makes me happy that we do have something that we can continue to share, despite the diminished capacity of her thought process.
Laura
Laura – as always, your words have touched me so deeply and I do hope we can meet one day in person soon. Your mother sounds like a beautiful and compassionate soul and I am honored to know that in some small way I have brought the spark of days gone by with her to you. Thank you also for your love and devotion to Mr. Jazz – he would be touched to know he has a fan and I really think you will enjoy his story. xoxox
Thank you Deb I look forward to meeting you one day, and I anxiously await Mr. Jazz’s story!